I noticed WBCL called me to talk about how WBCL helped with my wife and I rededicating our lives to our Lord Jesus Christ. I didn't answer because I knew I would start crying and wouldn't be able to share my testimony and how WBCL was one of the many moving parts that not only saved my marriage, but also kept me from ending my life.
My wife and I have been married for over 30 years and have been Christian's for just as long. We were baptized together at the church where we were married. The past several years Cindy and I have lost love for one another due to our lives being a total wreck...and I mean a WRECK!. Everything was a mess our spiritual lives, our finances, stress at work and our house was nothing more than a place where we lived together. There was no love in our marriage.
I prayed for several years for God to fix my marriage and help me be the Christian husband that I need to be. I know I was living a life of disobedience to God and I was in a constant battle between flesh and the Holy Spirit: I cried often. In October of last year I hit bottom and was so tired of my life and the way I was living. Cindy and I weren't living...we were just existing. I kept away from my adult daughters and their families as much as possible because I could only put on a happy show for so long and I didn't want my inner dirt to ruin my relationship with my daughter's and grandkids. My life was full of anger, frustration, worry and shame.
I continued praying and was very upset with God due to all the doors of success being shut in my face, but on the other hand I knew it was my disobedience to God that was keeping the blessings God wanted to give me. Anyway, in October I decided to wait until the New Year and stop paying my house payments for a few months and take an early retirement and cash in all my vacation days and sick days and take off and not tell anyone where I was going. I thought about that and thought about my daughter's and grandkids and started to cry. I gave it a few day's and started listening to WBCL. Your station kept playing this song and for the life of me I cannot remember the name or the artist, but he talked about hitting rock bottom and the only way to look was up. He also said that God must think he is strong for letting him go through the things he is going through and to forgive him if he is wrong.
You guys played that song a lot which got me thinking of my situation. I started reading my bible again, but got more angry and frustrated because I was so angry inside I couldn't understand what I was reading. I then decided to end my life on October the 17 ( a Friday).
On Wednesday the 15 of October, I was in the shower and was singing that song about hitting rock bottom that I heard on WBCL just about every day! I then prayed and told God that he knows my heart and that I was tired of the daily fight with my flesh and spirit and that he knows the sorrow and pain I am feeling and how unhappy and tired I am and that I can’t fight any longer. I told God that I was going to take my life Friday and come home to Him.
At that point (tears) my heart became hot, not painful hot, but loving hot, my body started to shake and the hair stood up on my arms and I felt a warmth that I have never felt before and my mind became quiet....I don't know how to explain it, but my mind was silent and there I heard a very nice, warm and pleasant voice say, " I love you Rob and I am not through with you yet. Have faith in me and give me your burdens....trust me." My mind was back to normal and I cried to God to take my burdens...all my baggage and I want to live my for you Lord I want to live my life and be the husband and father to my daughter's and grandfather you want me to be for my grandkids.
After my prayer I continued to cry for a while and I immediately fell in love with my wife and shared with her what just happened. We fell in love with each other, our hearts were immediately filled with love, joy and peace. Our house became a home filled with love, joy and peace. But it didn't stop there, it filtered to my adult daughter's and their families. What a joy ( crying). It has been three months and each day is wonderful. I still have bad days and good days, but the bad days are nothing...NOTHING!! compared to what they were and my relationship with our Lord Jesus Christ He is right there with me and sharing my situation. It's awesome because quite a few times Jesus will have WBCL play a song that fits my bad day situation and Jesus and I laugh about it and go on.
Listening to WBCL today God tugged on my heart and with that awesome pleasant voice told me to call WBCL and be a coffee can member. My budget is tight and there are days where Cindy and I have $20.00 left for the week and we have to decide on toilet paper or gas for the car..lol I started to cry with love knowing that God will take care of us and so I became a coffee can member and am proud of being a part of WBCL and thank you for being one of the many moving parts that not only saved my earthly life but aided in rededicating my life to our Lord Jesus Christ our savior.